How to Hook Up with a Girl: Opening Lines and Techniques

Pickup has a questionable connotation nowadays. Women frown upon men who try to win their attention with manipulative tactics. But pickup lines and hookup strategies aren’t always about dirty games.

Sometimes it’s a way to understand the person better. Hookups are an integral part of dating culture, so why not learn how to hook up with a girl ?

how to hook up with a girl

Basic rules of hooking up with girls

Girls hate baits. The first rule of a successful hookup is to hide the fact that it’s a hookup. Make it seem like a passionate getaway because women love a tender approach. Here are some rules of a win-win hookup:

Rule number one: hookups are not a commitment

Some women are searching for a fun time while others are hoping a hookup can trap a man into a relationship. It’s best to define a hookup before the night begins. The first rule is setting boundaries and understanding that no one is obliged to take it any further. Before you hook up, it’s best to say you are not looking for a dating partner. Yes, you might sound like  a jerk, but at least you are sincere. If a girl puts on a sad face after you say that, she was totally looking for a relationship.

Rule number two: no one owes anything

Hookups are meant to be spontaneous and lighthearted. No one is falling in love, no one is getting mixed signals and crying over missed calls. Hookup mates are almost friends in a sense. They meet up, have sex, eat ice cream. Sometimes they sleep in the same bed or watch movies. It almost seems like dating, but without a commitment. Unless both parties want to change the status quo, don’t expect anything besides sex.

Rule number three: use protection

It doesn’t matter how much you trust your hookup friend. If you can find a girl to hook up with, you can find a condom. It doesn’t even matter if you like to use protection. Sex is the game for two, so at least make sure your date stays clean and healthy. The same thought should cross their mind as well.

Rule number four: sex should be pleasant for two

Let’s be honest: unless you are in a commitment, what are her benefits of staying over? Women need to get off too. Sex means mutual pleasure, so you should think about her orgasms too. Don’t be selfish and make sure she has a swell time.

Rule number five: how to tell if a girl wants to hook up

In other words, consent, consent, consent. If you don’t see a thrilled face, you may soon catch a case. Remember that even if you are drunk at a club, this is not enough evidence to bring a stranger girl home. Make sure you hook up with conscious girls who verbally express their desire.

Rule number six: Be a good host/guest

Even if you attend each other’s premises “to do the nasty,” you still need to remember common courtesy. There should be tea in your cabinet and fresh towels on the washing machine. Have a set of clean bed sheets for the occasion, and a bottle of lube, just in case.

How to approach her: opening lines and tactics

Approaching a girl may be difficult and awkward, but the more you do it, the better you get at the hookup game. Here are some decent pickup lines and strategies when hooking up with a girl.

how to get a girl to hook up with you

Come up with a tagline

No, taglines aren’t awkward unless you make them awkward. You see, opening one-liners are like your Instagram feed. We have approximately ten seconds to grab someone’s attention. If you are boring and self-conscious from the beginning, you are not going to score. A nice simple compliment will do.

Compliment her outfit

It’s a lighter version of a pickup because complimenting an outfit is like testing waters. Saying “I like your style” sounds friendlier than “nice butt.” Still, you incline that her appearance is of great interest. Any girl will be flattered to hear that as a conversation starter.

Buy her a drink

If you’ve met at a club, it’s nice to present a token of your affection. You can be anywhere, from the café to the park. Come up with something. Either buy her a cone of ice cream or a cup of coffee. It will immediately put her in the right mood and comfort a girl.

The best way to hook up with a girl: always test the waters first

To have a successful hookup, estimate your chances. A single interested girl will smile and nod when you are talking. A closed-off pose and an outright “no” is not an invitation to convince her. A “no” is a “no.” Only approach women who are already up for a quick date.

Look confident and polished

Several shots of vodka won’t buy you confidence. Unless both of you are too drunk to care, it’s best to train confidence at home. Buy an online course, visit a therapist if you have communication problems. Work on your self-image, find hobbies, broaden your mind. When you feel confident, you project confidence. More women would understand that you are safe to trust if you look polished, well-dressed, and well-mannered.

Be kind and friendly

If you hope to pull off a Mickey Rourke in “9 1/2 Weeks,” don’t be too conceited. Unless you are a real psycho, it would be impossible to play a bad boy without coming off as a douchebag. Women are simply scared of mysterious men in a crowd in real life. It would be easier to appear sincere and friendly, even if your intentions are not the purest.

Slowly continue the topic

Since both of you know where this is going, give a hint that you want to continue talking in a more intimate atmosphere. How to ask a girl if she wants to hook up? If you see positive signs like a smile and flirting, tell her you’d like to get away from the crowd. Invite her over for a cup of coffee or a movie. But beware. If you don’t invite a woman for sex, she doesn’t owe you one. Don’t be mad if you end up watching a movie. After all, you are the one who needs to articulate your desires.

Be a gentleman

If you end up at your house, don’t treat a girl like a disposable razor (even if you don’t plan to see her again.) Bring a clean towel, offer a shower, and a cup of coffee. Make sure she gets home safely. Think about safety during sex.

Best places to hook up with a girl 

Where to hook up with a girl? You can do it anywhere, both online and offline. If you are talking about real life, here are your best options:

At a nightclub

A club is a place where people let loose. They dance and drink. Women wear flashy dresses and high heels. The atmosphere screams “random sex with a stranger,” so it might be your best bet.

how to tell if a girl wants to hook up

At a park

Although it might be creepy to approach people in the park, it’s cute and safe to meet in the daylight. If you see an attractive girl walking her dog, approach her and tell her she’s beautiful.

Café or restaurant

You can navigate the public depending on the atmosphere. It’ll be easy to hook up with a girl with a casual café by asking to join for a cup of coffee. Things are more complicated in restaurants because people rarely go there alone. Still, you can find a good catch there.


If you see a cute stranger, why not approach her? The only drawback is, people don’t expect to be approached romantically in the streets, so it’s a 50/50 chance she will be down for a hookup.


If a friend throws a party, chances are, there will be charming strangers. Offer a drink and tell a funny story to ease up.

College or work

Although hooking up at a college campus or a workplace is often prohibited by subordinate rules, you can still meet up at someone’s place.

How to ask a girl to hook up over text?

If you use social media to hook up, here are some rules of “sliding into her DMs”:

Start with a compliment

Men often mix up compliments and liking posts on social media. If you want her to ACTUALLY interact, do better. Say that you like her pictures, hair, clothes, body, anything not too bizarre. Ask if she’s down for a conversation.

Follow up

How to know if a girl wants to hook up? If a girl didn’t block you, it’s a good sign. Continue talking and ask to meet in real life eventually. No one usually meets up with a stranger without talking, unless you are using social media specifically for hookups.

Ask to meet

Make sure you have photos on your profile page. Don’t stalk her or invite her to your place immediately. Women are scared of the first date with a stranger, so it’s better to meet in public and win her trust first.

So this is how to get a girl to hook up with you. Women are not easy to woo, but if you combine confidence, good posture, a positive approach, and a safe atmosphere, you might count on more than one hookup.


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